Life

Had the most amazing get away with some wonderful friends for a little more than twenty four hours.  We went to a little town nestled in the mountains of North Carolina, called Boone.  Now I have heard about this place from my eldest son Shaun, who goes here to camp whenever it snows, but I had never visited.  I probably would have never experienced this amazing little town other than our friends happen to have a house there, high up on the mountain ridge overlooking the valley where the town is situated.

Sometimes, we just need r & r as the military call it, and we needed that.  My wonderful mother-in-law is slipping away, surely, but very gradually.  She is ninety eight and five months old, and has been an amazing influence in my children's and grandchildren's lives.  It is very hard to see someone you love slip away.  This lady has the most intelligent mind I know, skipped two grades in school, and was doing the New York Times crossword up until a few short months ago, when she slipped to the floor from some unknown issue that caused her to become totally blind and almost unable to get out of her chair by herself anymore.  She went to a nursing home three years and some months ago after having three heart episodes in ten days.  We had signed a DNR and believed her time had come.  Then, just like this amazing lady does, she rallied, but we knew we could not look after her medically any more and she moved into a nursing home.We have been lucky, she has come home for every birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas, but now, that is no longer possible.  She can barely feed herself and tonight was signed into hospice.  Our prayer is that our Lord takes her home in the most peaceful circumstance.

Our peaceful circumstance happened on the top of a mountain, overlooking a town called Boone, with wonderful believing friends who we could share our feelings.  It was almost orchestrated when the snow fell outside our picture window in our bedroom looking out over the valley below, with lights twinkling in the small town tucked into the valley, and the end of October long before we are supposed to be sprinkled upon by the white stuff.

God is good.

Running The Race

Running the race that is set before us is very different for each and everyone of us.  Success often gets confused with fame.  You can be famous, just think about it, and yet not be successful. I would prefer on every scenario to be successful.  Success is when you reach your goal, that hopefully you have set, and written down.  It comes in many forms, most of which do not lead to fame or fortune, but nonetheless, achieved and successful.

In another life, somewhere back in time, I was asked to be the motivational speaker for a cosmetic company, based on the fact that when we were in trouble with a business once, I became an Avon representative.  Of course, everyone laughed, jeered, made jokes about it, but within about six weeks, I was the #3 top seller in my district.  I moved quickly, within 6 months exactly, from representative, walking the streets in those days, to stand-in manager, then manager, with my own district, car and expense account.  That was success, not fame.  This is what I spoke about in my motivational speaker days.  In fact, I still tell people to not concentrate on the famous thing, but the success in what you are trying to achieve.

The race I run now is so different from back then.  In fact, I run several different races in one day.  But, the prize I run for is singular.  The quest in my mind is clear, although I do admit it has been clouded from time to time, mostly by pride, or rejection.  How do I get the message about the "lost" children out there?  How do I make a difference in how the church and the world perceive and understand the need, for not only intervention in this increasingly alarming number of children coming into care, or being orphaned, but rising to the need that exists for foster and adoptive parents to step up to the plate.  Once upon a lifetime ago, the church took care of this.  There were no agencies, at least here in our homeland, but, over time, we have become self involved, the task becoming so great it is better to either ignore or discard.

But, the fact remains, there are children, all around the world, who are orphaned, or taken into care, because of drugs and alcohol mostly, and in some third world countries where there is fighting and unrest, without parents, or, parents who have no income and are forced to leave their children in orphanages that have not enough staff, and not enough care and food.

This is my calling, and my mission to try, even in the smallest way, to bring awareness to the community at large about this growing need.

Answered prayer

God does answer prayer, even when we least expect it.  Life is a challenge and in that challenge, we sometimes forget that God is always there, just over our shoulder, looking down, watching for the exact moment when the Holy Spirit can fall and convict us.  That very thing happened yesterday when, it seemed, the whole sermon, in fact a word given to the pastor at 3 a.m. that morning, revolved around a couple of my kids.  In those moments, the hair rises on the back of your neck, a funny feeling hits you, and your mind is devoid of any other thoughts than the ones that the Holy Spirit is putting there.

We have been praying so hard that we had almost given up on our African rescue to be saved, or at least brought to a place where he understood there really was a God, not just a figment of your imagination, or a person heard of through many sermons and kind words from others.  Without God, he, as we are, is nothing.  Oh there can be lots of things that are human and even worthy, such as wealth and achievements, but there is nothing without the leading and following of God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  All things fade away in value, when they are weighed against the will of God.

And after all the prayers and the worries of whether our child would ever let the guards down from his heart, it happened.  All in one day.  He walked forward, on his own, accepted the Lord, and prayed, sincerely prayed.  Not only for himself, but for his sisters, one who is free to talk to him, and one is kept away, banned, because he is "not a good influence".  I am sorely afraid, that is not the truth.  He is now redeemed, forgiven, blessed and his name is in the book of life.  And then, in the very same day, with wholehearted thanks to our friends Jocelyn and Garland, baptized in our pool just hours after his commitment.  Rog was in the pool with Gar, but there was just a little "dust" in the air.

This is not the first time I have really trusted God for salvation of one of my near and dear loved ones in my family, and I know it will not be the last.  Always, trust in God, He is the answer even if we are not looking for one.

Improv

Aussies, as in me, are very prone to improv.  That is, guests arrive at a minutes notice and you feed them, without question.You, as an Aussie, are required to have enough food on hand to feed whoever comes through your door.  Some people in my past church lives have been fooled into thinking this means I have a helps, or hospitality ministry.  Bah humbug!  I am just an Aussie who is supposed to be cordial.

Tonight that spontaneous visitor stuff just happened.  We were minding two of our littlest grandchildren, when friends suddenly phoned to say they were on their way to get goats milk and eggs, of which we have an abundance, and then our eldest son arrived with his kids and the fun began.  We forget that unplanned events can be some of the best times.  The company is what counts, and the food is secondary.

The children just had a riotous time, the noise level, must have busted some sound wave, good food was eaten, great conversation was had and none of it was planned.  I am sure that once upon a year many years ago, it was the same.  A neighbor called by unexpectedly and a memory was made.  I am so glad I do not so plan my days that I cannot still be caught up in the moment and just go with what happens next.

I go to my bed with unexpected grandchildren sleeping alongside my own, happy to be at "Glammy's" and waking up to some more good fun down at the farm.  Treasure these times, they are few in life.  I will always treasure them.

Miracles

In the last two years, I have walked such a fine line that has almost killed me, put me on the floor, wondered what the heck I took on.  But, I always knew that God put me here, in this very place, in this very circumstance to cope, grow, learn and parent in a way I never anticipated.  I have done a lot of parenting/foster-parenting classes over the last somewhat 14 years, but I don't think anyone anticipates the training needed for parenting a child from an overseas adoption that is not a baby, let alone a busted adoption.  Oh, this sort comes with all sorts of questions that are unanswered.

I have battled systems, regulations, state councils, Governers' offices, educational services, and a whole lot more, that could never answer my questions, or give solutions, to the problems we encountered in rescuing a dumped, green carded, American adoptee from another country.

Today, I have experience more than one miracle that can maybe give justice to this situation. Unfortunately, I cannot give the names of either, but, I can tell you first hand, I have hope, belief, and cause to do so, that God will rectify what has been done to innocent children that do not deserve for the abuse to continue.

It's Time

About a year ago, a very reputable journalist approached me through this blog for the real account of the journey of Isaiah and his sister CeCe.  I was very skeptical at first, but realized she was a genuine person. Over the last year we have become advocates for these children, although, I think, from different sides of the perspective.  While I am thinking from a very committed Christian point of view, she is coming from a doubting real Christianity view.  And, guess what, I don't blame her.  There are so many wrong points of view from so called "Christians" that, quite frankly, make you wonder what doctrine they are listening to.

But, we have met in the middle, and our interests, combined, regardless of what we believe, is in the future and past of these children.  These children have been used, abused, manipulated and discarded for pure human selfish and survival reasons.  They have been thrown aside without regard for their traumas, their sufferings, their somewhat hard to cope with survival instincts, that can separate and divide a formed family.  They end up in a pile or heap at the bottom, all because most of the adoptive parents are hoping for someone they can "save" "heal", or just make "them" feel like a hero.  Some of these kids are so damaged they cannot give anything back, or escape the "survival" disorder or phase, but some, a few, can get past that, with the right parenting, the right guidance, and that is without the wishy washy phase of giving in because the kid is "damaged" or "underprivileged".

Parenting these kids is tough, somewhat depilating, because you don't want to be hard, fixed, and demanding of what you need in them to survive in the family system.  But, God willing, you can, and do.
Some of this story is about to be released in a national magazine.  It has been accepted, to tell the whole story, in a magazine of which I do not know the name yet, but applaud their insight into a situation that needs rectifying, at the very least.

I might add, Isaiah and CeCe's sister is still in this situation, needing to be rectified.  If you believe in prayer, please pray.  There is a mandate in this country of no child left behind.  I can testify and provide proof, that both Isaiah and CeCe were left behind, so far in fact, that it was too much for  CeCe, and the utmost test and trial for Isaiah to make it in education.  It is tough when no-one sought or even cared to realize that education counts.

God's timing

As many of you know that follow this blog, we rescued a child from Liberia a couple of years ago.  In my heart I forgive those involved and somewhat deceived into thinking that this "child" had committed such heinous crimes that he need to be dumped, without identity or money, other than what he had earned as a laborer,  at the ripe old age of thirteen.  There is a dark, unbelievable story behind all of this, which was the reasoning for him to "be rid of" and never seen again.  I really don't think they understood the ramifications of their actions.  How could they know he would be starving, have malaria and see his young five year old cousin die next to him on a makeshift pallet, have African "chiggers" dug out of his feet, without pain medication, by sharpened bamboo sticks, see "rebels" kill others around him, have a gun held to his head with the threat of death, climb a coconut tree, twenty feet in the air, when he was so starving that it was worth the effort, and drink from a stream that not only bathed them, but washed their clothes as well.

The sadness in this is I do know that they knew.  They went to this terrible place, where there is no World Vision or other large ministries to help, and they saw and experienced an unbelievably primitive place called Monrovia, Liberia.  That palls into insignificance when you go to Rivercess, in the Interior of Liberia, where he was ultimately sent to spend the rest of his life.  He wasn't even in the town, he was two hours walk from there in the jungle, forest, whatever we want to name it, without recourse of any kind.  He was left to survive on his own at the ripe old age of 13.  He was thrust into his "great aunt's" family which already had too many children she couldn't handle.  Oh, because of his "heinous deeds" he was supposed to be sent to a female free environment, but then how did he witness his five year old female cousin die beside him with malaria, while he was inflicted himself, on the pallet beside him.There is so much more that has been revealed to me, gradually, over the last two years, as Isaiah has begun to find trust in this tough, yet understanding Mom.

About a year ago, I received an inquiry from a person I did not know, asking whether the child I had blogged about, without name, was indeed Isaiah.  After researching, I found this person to be legitimate and to have a genuine interest in the past abuse of this child.  We formed a relationship and over the last year have communicated, interviewed, and become compatriots in finding why these children from other countries end up like this.  I am wonderfully surprised to receive confirmation from her that this is going to be exposed in a reputable magazine.  I pray, that this is a good report.  I have always known that God in his infinite timing would expose the wrongs done to these children, and I am not betrayed.  God is God.  His timing is His timing and I pray justice as the Lord sees it, is done.

Amazing Love

Yesterday I went back into the studio to record the re-write on one of my favorite songs I've ever written. I knew it needed a re-write, but just couldn't find the place or the words to start with.  I think why I like it is because the title The Love Of Jesus is needed in everyone's life.  I am blessed to have found it, but what caused the write to happen now, was I realized so many people don't, especially a lot of "lost" kids that bounce around the foster care system.  I originally wrote it for someone who was going through a very hard time and did not understand His love or how you even found it.

I forgot for a minute that there are so many people, who do not understand either.  Our last child to be added to the family, was a young teen who was from a broken adoption.   Not only was it broken, but he was literally dumped back on the streets of Monrovia, Liberia.  I got past that wrong decision by the parents writing it off to youth and lack of foster/adoptive parent training.  But I can't get past the damage done to this child's body, mind and soul.

He knows about Jesus, he lives in a house where Jesus is invited in every minute of our day.  He can sit in church and pretend to listen and sometimes does and can tell you exactly what the sermon was about.  But, none of those words ever get past his mind, they never penetrate his soul, or his heart because it is hard, closed and fiercely protected.   He has come a long way since the angry, and I now know, frightened kid I picked up in Brussells a little over two years ago.  He's not openly angry, and I do catch a smile more often these days, but he keeps to himself, guarding his emotions, with a tangible wall built very firmly around him.  I have broken through a few times, and he has now just about told me every horrid, shocking detail of his life since he left his father's care at the age of about five.  So, there is a thin veil of trust, but so fragile, that it can only stay in place for short bursts of time.  When it is broken, we start again, then start again and start again.  One day, it will be strong enough to stand, as he will, in a new confidence that there is someone who loves him unconditionally, his Savior Jesus.

And that was the inspiration for the re-write which left very few words intact other than the hook, The Love Of Jesus.  This is the link, share it, especially with someone who doesn't know His amazing love.


http://www.theadoptionthing.org/LoveofJesus.mp3